As a previously a relationship coach I come across lot of stories which gives me an opportunity to learn about human behaviour .Stories are the most powerful way to pass on the messages. I wanted to share this story because this is one of the reasons why people aren’t able to maintain the relationship .This have 2 people Numi ,worldy wise but obsessed about his needs and Tota who again is worldy wise but have been a phoenix rising from its ashes after every failure. This story started because Numi showed interest in Tota. Numi was handsome guy but he was a philosopher like Rumi missing the understanding of human emotions. Tota being a gal who was talkative and more of friend in need kinds thought Numi to be the same. Both showed their interests with thought process of long term future but we forgot Numi never had been a long term relationship but more of friend with benefits and not continuing them beyond few months that too with multi-national gals to avoid the question of the marriage . Moment it popped up relationship was doomed for failure. While our Tota was so different she believed in the relationships for long term but have been cheated on early on. Both has unresolved issues in their life that they forgot to deal with while trying to build the castle of their dreams. Numi could not be held responsible for anything in his life while Tota had been troubled so much that she used to take everything to her heart and felt responsible for other fault as well. But why ? is the question. How this relationship was doomed to fail from start . The spark of the relationship was gone the moment anxious tota was always looking for reassurance in the relationship while Numi being the avoidance cater was dreading from the same and he wasn’t able to take the seriousness of the relationship. Being the peaceful temperament and in childhood being ignored for his needs he had adopted the avoidance strategy to deal in the relationships. He had learnt to numb his emotions while Tota has learnt to be vocal about her emotions and could express them easily even when emotions run high. But what she couldn’t take was Numi lying even though she was sure that he is not cheating on tota by meeting his friend but need to hide arouse because she questioned him. One difficult conversation they both showed their weak side. Only learning I could suggest was to atleast move out of this for the time being . Work on yourself . Change the vibrations you are working on. This anxiety behavior of tota where everytime she looked for care from her guardian they had left her to the world to take care of tota ,she was paranoid if this was because she did something wrong and she had developed what we term it as anxiety in all her relationship . Were they to be blamed ? I don’t think so . They may be two right individual meeting at the wrong time where they were dealing from fear rather than love . They both are individuals on their journey to discover the pattern they have formed in the relationships and to break free them else this will be repeated again and again in their life even if they get married they would have faced this issue. Path to improve themselves if they learn is the beginning of bringing the right peaceful vibrations in the relationship
Will keep you posted whether they changed their vibrations on path to build a beautiful relationship or either of them progressed in life
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