How would you feel if you know you have to stick by the man who is going outside but is with you because of society pressure ? Would respect that person ? Will you be able to love that person ? I am no one to judge you but if your consciousness allows you then be it . You are your own truth . But there are some females who demand 100% while giving 100% . Some people are not bonded by society but their inner truth. I have asked females and males What is marriage for them and why they want o marriage ? I have got some strange responses some want to do it for their parents and then when after intial excitment is over wait for their parents death to get over the burden but by then they would got the kids by that time . So they lie to themselves that is the truth of the world we live in . While some have said they wanted to procreate with their own genes seriously you bring something to world because you have strange desire while world is fighting with global warming and awarding people who don’t procreate anymore !!! I have known people who are in marriage and their partners have cheated on them . Imagine even if they post lovely pictures for society’s sake or to be believe their partner still love them and go to psychiatrist every week .Strangely on the surface layer whatever they have said because of society’s pressure etc but everybody wants to be with somebody for the fear of loneliness . You can’t gaurantee any future for anybody what if that person dies in an accident , there are lot of whatifs .What is more harmful sticking to a marriage where you are emotional robbed each day and degraded for the things you are not meant to be because of personality but by gender you are imposed for or being alone trying to build the right relationship . If you have right what and why for the marriage please go ahead with person you want to else marriage can be burdensome to an extent you can never image. To get some moments of peace I have seen such females to go outside and look for peace . You can understand this from the thappad movie where the lawyer herself is stuck in marriage and for few moments to be that butterfly and have peace goes outside of home bound . if we don’t stop at this stage where females have beared lot of diseases and gone outside the to seek freedom and peace ,the very institute of marriage will be seen broken soon . Marry someone when you are sure to be going through the journey together . The kind fof compromises the marriage asks for can’t be done unless both people understand each other well and ready to be together. This can be imagined from the rockstar movie , there is a layer to nagris fakri which she is able to open in front of only ranbir kapoor . No other person could take that away the feeling he has for nagris from the ranbrir , no amount of physical intimacy could replace the bond nagris has with ranbir , the emotional support both used to get from each other. If we see the dream girl the theme of that movie is that a call center girl pooja is a dream girl of so many people because she understands everybody and talks to them in their language . We are selfish being ,No person wants to understand what the girl might be looking for ever they just know she is able to understand and try to grab that person . Understanding doesn’t mean that you don’t question the other person . There are women in this world who have said they will not compromise their peace of mind for society’s pressure if they get their dream boy not physically but emotionally. Be it Alia Bhatt from Highway who fall for Randeep Hooda where she thinks his kidnapper has best intention for her than her own parents . Basic instinct in each human being is to be heard but if they don’t get heard while staying together they feel more deserted . What do you want to choose today is your choice ? I have seen people who have been in wrong relationship to be jealous of the people who are single and have wit of stand of pressure of society. When people start to preach other people to be get married , my basic question is if you are in your happy state why preach people , why can’t both state of people exist ? Why force people to go through what you have gone through ? I have seen people giving advice if marriage is uphill why don’t you bring the child ? Sorry if there is a problem between 2 people how the hell on earth third person can bring them closer on any decision. All these advices just means let’s keep our drawing room neat and clean while cupboard could be mess . For whose life are you living today. I have also seen the other spectrum of people who go on length to advise that men are not good . Trust me I have faith in marriage because I have seen nice men in my life who keep my faith in humanity alive first then relationship. Some of my best mentors in my life have been men . Don’t bash men but look for just ways to express yourself without being judged . That’s all we are looking for .Be it men be it women . we want to be loved at the end of the day in one form or another . Sometimes its okay to be a mess but never be lonely . Find out ways to keep yourself happy even if you are not in relationship , go for movies alone , go out have dinner dates wuth yourself , be the person you wanted to become . Love your unconditionally . Then be with the person who understand you and you understand them give each other the respect , trust and communication to be who you want to be . It’s not only for the marraige , but in general for all the relationship you build give each person to be who they are with respect and love . if you build each relationship like that without any judgements you may be alone as per society but never lone .
What do you define to be alone or lonely will change the way you see people around . Both are the adjectives to express the separation from the general population. On one hand Alone means to be a single person who is separate from others on the another hand lonely is one who is feeling sadness because of isolation or abandoment . What is more lonely when you are alone and happy or being with the legal partner and feeling lone because you have abnadoment . Without naming any of the female , I will give away their stories because its everyday norm and it could be your next door neighbour or the person whose pictures who adore on the Facebook every now and then .
Life will come easy to you when you know yourself well and then you bring the right people in your life rather than from the needy place . Happiness is the ultimate truth why wait for another person to bring it to you . Learn to be happy irrespective of anyone and you will never be alone .What you choose today will define the state of your being tomorrow . Choose what you want to create and world will meet your there . Choose your own right from the loving state and create your own story and see where this journey takes you . two synonym can mean so different but power of choice in your hand .
Loved the post, thanks for writing, it helped me.
Thanks Deep 🙂 As mentioned over fb char that its feels so good when your thought is read by people and may impact whom you have not met
Beautifully expressed Bhoomika. The clarification of Alone and Lonely is to the point and clearly.The examples are live and we see it around everytime.Great expression and writing style.
Thanks Mahesh your honest yet encouraging feedback always means a lot