Recently I was going through the news all over the world and my heart sank when I saw there was increase in domestic violence against woman. It triggerred my thought even in Western countries be it Italy , France , USA this is global pandemic , woman have to face so much and more to be put in words. This flabbergasted me, I was taught that woman of western world are stronger than the women of eastern world. At the same time my experience of working and talking to lot of Danish , Dutch and Brit ladies I could never imagine that these people can be violated easily in any relationship. On the high level I came to acceptance that domestic violence doesn’t doesn’t discrimate anyone .May be the percentage of the woman who face such may be less . I am not going to talk about the number or percentage because they will only depress us. Domestic violence is not only physical abuse but also any behaviour with the purpose to gain power and control over other person in intimate relationship. Domestic violence starts from threats and verbal abuse to violence .Although physical impact of the abuse seems to be the most dangerous but psychological and emotional abuse leaves a lasting impression on the person. It can deplete person of the self-worth and compel them to go through anxiety and depression from the lonely feeling. When you start to feel intimated by your partner in any form its better to hit the road and never to return to the den .
It intrigued with few open questions like why some woman can leave the abusive relationship easily ? What factors keeps a woman in abusive relationship to continue in the abusive relationship? If listed comes down on 2-3 things – a)dependency in any form of financial , emotionally or socially dependent on the abuser. Some times people stay for the kids .b) fear – be it society’s pressure or abuser has threatened in any form. Since the abuser has physcially hit in the past , the victim believes that they are capable of the same to their near dear oness. c) Isolation – since in some society it is lot of taboo attached to physical abuse , victim shy away from asking for help . Or because in some other society considers that domestic violence is fault of woman . Even though the above view is changing but people still carry this view in their hearts.
If you ever think someone is going through domestic violence in any form . just try to talk to them and let them know you care about them , Victim might not even tell and be prepared for that but this one step might help someone . Just let them know if they want to talk they can with you and you will not judge today or tomorrow .Give them that space . This will give them courage to take the stand.
Don’t try to preach how they could have handle the situation that might force them to give in the shell and telling its their fault that violence helped to them .
In my childhood I was taught few moves to be used when I get stuck in situation and ran away to safe place. Touchwood I never had to use it , but I really want to enroll myself for self defense class such so that I feel more empowered and people around me also get encouraged and enroll.